What he didn't say was that it would take a hoist to lift the corners high enough to put the fitted sheets on.
This was just one of the things we didn't realize when we handed over an $80 deposit and told the man to deliver our bed C.O.D. to our first little home. No, we didn't think we needed any of the many accessories he said we might want to get.
The first night we filled the bed too full. I lay there listening to unnerving sloshing sounds, until my husband jumped in. I don't know how many times I bounced up to the ceiling before we decided to let some water out, only to discover that a drain kit was one of those extras we hadn't opted to buy.
So I went back to the store the next morning to get a drain kit and a few more accessories including a set of flat sheets and two pair of water-sloshing, sound-reducing earplugs.
Then we let some agua out over a period of weeks until we thought we had it right.
"What are all those little green things floating around?" my husband asked on the fourth attempt.
"I'm not sure, but they look like clumps of algae."
"Great! We not only have a year's supply of water stowed away in our mattress, we have a hydroponic garden in there, too."
Maybe we let too much water out? The next morning I couldn't get out of bed. No matter how I twisted and turned, I was engulfed in wave after wave of vinyl-encased H2o. Finally, I got all the waves going in the same direction and let them do the work, rolling me to the edge of the mattress.
Resigned, I returned to the store to buy the two remaining recommended accessories--a tube of algae retardant and a bottle of Dramamine.
Cheerfully, the salesman if I liked my bed. I almost said no, but a strange sloshing in my head bounced my chin quite firmly up and down.
